*sniffles, and then starts bawling* Stupid Nicholas Sparks…*continues to be absorbed in book*

A lot of books are made into movies.  Usually, I’m content to read/watch (usually read) one or the other.  A few weeks ago, I saw the book The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks at a book fair at a library.  I thought, “Huh, you know, I saw the movie and liked it and…I kind of want to read the book.”  So I bought it and I just got around to reading it.

I didn’t cry in the movie.  But I’m about 10 pages into the first chapter in the part of the book that makes you want to cry, and I want to absolutely bawl my eyes out.

After I finish the book, I’m going to watch the movie again.  And then watch something lighthearted and really cheery like the most epic dragon movie ever, How To Train Your Dragon.

Usually I can come up with good titles. Here, you’re just lucky I can put words together in an understandable fashion.

OMG OMG OMG OMG

I just found out (realized, rather.  I’ve been sitting on this information for a while, but it just hit me) that a girl I used to go to school with is dating one of the cooks from the college cafeteria.  Who, of course, I used to work with.

Which is fine, except that he and I were both on the younger end of the spectrum when it came to age in that cafeteria.  (He was farther along on the spectrum than me, however but I’m not sure how much.)   I associate him with everyone else in the cafeteria.  And I cannot express to you enough how much I don’t want to think about some of the other people I worked with dating.

It’s like that moment when you realized that your parents had to have sex (and exactly what that entailed) in order for you to be sitting there.

It’s very very weird…to say the least.

This has been a long time coming. *happily sighs*

OMG!  So so so…I got reinspired.  I’m writing again!  I wrote a grand total of…(wait for it)…1800+ words today, in just over 3 pages.  I’m kind of worried about the characters internally monologuing to an extreme.  Hmm.  At any rate, it’ll get faster and I can always cut it down later if I feel like it’s too much.  For right now, I’m just excited to be writing again.

I bet you wanna read an excerpt, right?  No, no you don’t.  You probably don’t care.  And if that’s the case, then you can just stop reading now and move on because I’m going to put an excerpt here.  (Small excerpt.  I’m just so excited, you know?!)

———————————————-

Out of the blue, the office door burst open. Miriam turned, her eyes wide with shock, just in time to see Evelyn slam the door shut and bar it shut with her body.

Evelyn was the head waitress for a reason. The woman had a cold stare that could make rhinos turn in fear. It was Evelyn Miriam trusted to deal with the most difficult of customers, in whichever way Evelyn saw fit. Evelyn was one of the most down-to-earth, no-nonsense people Miriam had come across. And yet, Evelyn stood before Miriam, with trembling features and running mascara, clearly terrified.  Miriam studied the head waitress for a moment before she picked up the phone. The urgently whispered numbers, “9-1-1,” had hardly left Evelyn’s mouth when Miriam punched the three numbers into the phone.

Miriam had no idea what was going on. The office was in the back of the restaurant, behind the kitchens. Often times, the cooks made enough noise to completely cover whatever noise was made in the main room.  Plates had been dropped, yelling had ensued and as long as it stayed in the main room, Miriam hadn’t a clue. But if Evelyn was this scared, this terrified…Miriam shuddered as the feeling of dread grew deep within her stomach.

Miriam only had enough time to realize that the kitchens were mysteriously silent before three things happened, almost instantaneously.

The first thing was that the woman at the 911 call center came on, just in time to hear the second thing: the sound of a gunshot, and a man’s voice screaming out, “I better be able to see you in five seconds, or you’re going to see a lot more of this young lady than you ever wanted to!”

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So, that’s the story.  (Any edits or comments you want to make are welcome.)  Well, obviously, it’s not the entire story, just part of it.

I can’t tell you too much more about the story, only that it’s about this guy who comes in and takes an entire restaurant hostage.  It’s intensely psychological and, well…it’s just intense.  If you couldn’t catch on to that.

At any rate, I’m excited.  😀  1800+ words!  Yay!

Selling skepticism by the pounds! Come and get it! Good price!

I went to get my haircut on…oh, when was it?  Thursday, I think.  At any rate, t’s something that I’ve needed for a while – the bottom layer of my hair was bleached blonde about a year ago, so I had about four inches of bleach blonde hair and then my normal brown hair, and my hair was getting entirely too long – and so my mom finally went, “Okay, let’s go do it now.”

I swear, I had hardly sat my bottom in the chairs where they wash your hair when the woman started pushing products on me.  One product, in particular.  “I can feel that the shampoo you use is no good for you.  Use this.  It’s much better.”  Encouraged by my half-hearted sounds of assertion, she continued.  “I’m using it on your hair now.  It’s very good.  Much better.”

Over the years, I’ve gotten into the habit of questioning commercials.  What are the “leading products” that they’re forever mentioning that they’re products are better than?  Who did they test them on?  For how long?  When other people noticed improvement, how much improvement?  And on the questions go.

As you can tell, I don’t trust the people who try and push products on to me, especially if 1. they are people I do not know personally and who do not know me and/or 2. they benefit in some way if I buy said products.  I mean, let’s be honest here. Company X with product Y cares less about me and more about the five dollars in my pocket.  They don’t benefit from my wellbeing.  In fact, most of the time they benefit more from me not being well.  Tylenol doesn’t make any money if I don’t get headaches or fevers or whatever.  Likewise, hairdressers don’t get business if they go all, “Oh no, your hair is fine.  I don’t need to do a thing to it.”  Of course they’re going to tell you that you need this treatment (which she didn’t push onto me, thank goodness) or that shampoo.  It’s just all a ploy to get more money.

Which my mother, bless her heart, fell for – hook, line and sinker.  The hairdresser’s weaseled $42 out of her in shampoos, conditioners and styling mousse-y stuff.  Now, I have to admit that the styling mousse-y stuff really does work.  My hair becomes about 100x curlier with that in.  But still.  There had to be some other product that did the same thing.  Even if they had said, “Now, what you’re looking for is _____.  You can find it at ____, but we do carry some here and it’s $3 off it’s normal price.”  (True story.  Well, the $3 off bit.)  That would have been better.  At least then, I would have had some indication of something I was looking for and had the option to find it somewhere else.  At least then, it wasn’t “Buy it here or don’t buy it at all.”

$43.  Included in that was a shampoo/conditioner pair that cost $30.  The mousse-y stuff was $13.  I mean, I know Mom’s defense is that I need the right stuff to make my hair look good for interviews and such, but still.  $43.  $30 of which I can’t confirm is any better than the $10 shampoos+conditioners that I would buy at…anywhere else.

I just wish she hadn’t spent $43 on me when she didn’t have to.

You can tell I’m excited because, regardless of the fact that I don’t have a specific time, I’m planning Friday out down to the last earring.

SO SO SO…OH EM GEE I’m so excited!  I finally called the woman in charge of the volunteers at a non-profit that runs a garden about coming in to see and talk about the organization and the garden.  Apparently, it’s fallen into disrepair and there’s one other person who contacted her about volunteering there.  So we’re going to meet sometime on Friday (gotta get down on Friday!  Sorry.  I had to do that.  My deepest apologies.).  I’m not sure what time yet – she’s going to email me that.  At any rate, this is actually happening!  I’m so excited.  I’ve already picked out what I’m going to wear.  (Nice pants and a nice shirt, necklace, etc and I’m going to bring crappy clothes and sneakers in case we’re going to start working then and there.)

I’m really excited.

Lol, I got sidetracked and just watched like 30 seconds of about 10 other music videos ARK has produced with other undiscovered teenagers (a couple were hardly that), all auto-tuned and bad lyrics.  It really is horrible.  Eugh.

The weirdest part is that everyone in the office I go to is Indian, which kind of makes me think of the mob and how they’re all stereotypically Italian and all most certainly bring pain to everyone else’s life.

Signs Your Dentist Might Be A Scam Artist:

  1. Your teeth never bother you until after you’ve had a supposed cavity supposedly filled.
  2. When you walk in to the office, you see shower curtains hung in lieu of actual walls.  “We’re redecorating,” your dentist insists as she ushers you to the little cubicle type space where you’ll spend the next two hours.  You notice that what’s supposed to be a dental chair closer resembles the office chair you saw at Target for $50.  Your doctor notices you looking at the wheels on the chair.  “Don’t worry.  The chair doesn’t move,” she says to you, and then under her breath she continues, “The last guy made sure of that.”
  3. Your dentist tells you that she will be working on the tooth third from the back three times, and after she hits you up with novocaine, she proceeds to work on the tooth on the opposite side of your mouth.
  4. She loves to stick all sorts of funky gadgetry in your mouth.  So much so in fact, that you have to wonder if there’s a purpose for half of them or if she’s competing with her coworker over who can fit the most dental tools in their respective client’s mouths.
And finally, sign #5 that your dentist might not really be a dentist:
As you’re rinsing your mouth out, you happen to glance out the window and see a man sprinting across the road away from the building.  Quick to follow him are two muscular men in suits who look suspiciously like the guys who have their butts glued to the chairs in the waiting room.  Your dentist notices you watching the chase and smiles at you.  “Don’t worry,” she says.  “They have guns and tasers.  He won’t get far.”
(If you couldn’t tell, I went to the dentist today.  Thus my scorn for dentists.  And if you were going to say that you feel my pain…*fiddles around in mouth with tongue*…No, I really doubt you do.  My anger/scorn/discontent, perhaps.  But not my pain.)

Between books for eight year olds and The Number One Bestseller, I think my library might be complete. Life goal: completed, mission: achieved.

I went to a book fair today at a library nearby.  It was awesome.  Crowded but so worth it.  I scored big time.  I’m very happy with my finds.

The finds?

-The Last Song and The Guardian by Nicholas Sparks.  I saw the movie for The Last Song, and I didn’t love it but I saw the book and I just thought, “Hmm.  I wonder what the book is like.”  I’ve read The Horse Whisperer (or is it simply Horse Whisperer?  I forget) and I liked it.  And the paperback books were on 25 cents (or 5 for a dollar), so I figured that if I hated it, it wasn’t too much of a loss.

-Sushi for Beginners by Marian Keyes.  I’ve never read anything by her but it looked like a happy/comical, adult-ish romance novel and I do enjoy those.

-While we’re on that topic, Can You Keep a Secret? by Sophie Kinsella.  I’ve read this book, (in fact, I’ve read…pretty much all of her books, except for the Shopaholic series which I read the first book of and was perfectly content to let the story stop there) and I adore it.  It’s really fantastic and funny.  I saw another one of her books, but I didn’t enjoy that as much so I didn’t buy it.

-A user’s guide to Adobe Photoshop CS2.  I actually have CS5, but considering that these books cost $20+ and this book was only $1 (or less.  I’m not entirely sure) and that I’m about 98.9% positive that CS2 and CS5 are very similar, it was worth it.  The way I see it, the book might not be able to tell me exactly what I need to do in order to achieve this effect, but it can direct me down the general road (whereupon I can experiment and try things out.  I’ve always learned better like that anyways) and it can also make me aware of things that I can use CS5 for that I hadn’t even thought of.  Honestly, I’m not going to buy $20+ book when I have the software at my fingertips and I’m not using it for anything but for fun.  I will, however, pay $1.  🙂

-Paper Towns by John Green.  It’s funny, you know.  I’m currently reading the last book of The Hunger Games Trilogy by Suzanne Collins (Mockingjay) and while it’s a good book, it’s sad and depressing and I have a sinking feeling that…well, something bad is going to happen and I hate sinking feelings and bad things…I like light, fluffy books that make you laugh and leave you with a smile on your face.  (And here I go and buy two Nicholas Sparks books.  Ugh.)  So, I went to Mara (if she’s not there, then she’s here) and browsed around on a selection of books she had reviewed, looking for something that was lighthearted and easy to read and something that would make me smile.  One of which was Paper Towns.  She said it was a good and funny read, so I thought, “Okay, I’ll see if it’s at the library next time I go in.”  Then, I’m at a different library (bigger one, actually), browsing around at the book fair.  I see one author whose name was Tim Green.  Ten minutes later, I see another author whose last name I forget but his first name was John.  For some reason, my mind puts these together (even though I had seen authors with the first time of John before that) and I remember about Paper Towns.  It never actually occurred to me, however, that I might find the book there.  I was completely flabbergasted when I did.  I read the prologue.  It looks like a good read.  I’m trying to decide whether or not I want to finish Mockingjay.

-How to Cheat a Dragon’s Curse by Cressida Cowell.  So last year, How to Train Your Dragon came out as a movie.  I watched and loved every minute.  This is the series that movie was based off of.  Now, admittedly, I haven’t read the other books, but come on.  It’s got dragons, it’s based off a movie I love, the main character’s best friend is afflicted with a lethal curse and will die unless Hiccup finds the cure, the legendary Potato.  How can this possibly go wrong?

“Well, let’s see.  1. It’s a book written for eight year olds…”

Shut up, Jiminy Cricket.

“2. It’s a book written for eight year olds…”

Stop talking. Now.

“3. It’s a book written for eight year olds.”

*Charlie glares and brings out duct tape.*

Ahem.  Where were we?

Stravaganza: City of Flowers by Mary Hoffman.  This is the third book in a series (or at least, it’s the third book as far as I know) that I’ve enj0yed in the past (aka, high school.  But hey, what can I say?  I’ve always had good taste in books) and I’m rather looking forward to reading this one.

– Lastly, Labyrinth by Kate Mosse.  This book I know next to nothing about and I’ve never heard of the author.  I mean, I read the back and thought, “Okay, yeah, this sounds…halfway decent,” whereupon I slipped it into my bag and only remembered it was there when I dumped my books out on the bed to take the afore-shown picture.  The part about this book that I like though?  If you take a closer look at the picture above (Labyrinth is the blue book on the bottom row), you’ll notice that right below the author’s name it has the words: The Number One Bestseller.

It didn’t top the New York Times bestseller list, it hasn’t sold over 10 million copies.  It’s not even the highest grossing book.  Nope.  All over the world, in the history of books, Labyrinth by Kate Mosse is The Number One Bestseller.  If you go to a bookstore in Nigeria and you ask for the book that sells the best, you will find yourself face-to-face with Labyrinth by Kate Mosse.  (It’s The Number One Bestseller, you know.)

And this time, you might actually want to listen when the guy selling the book tries to tell you that this is his last copy and that you better buy it now or it’s going to be gone in five minutes.